Blogger Blues

Being a blogger can be very stressful, the pressure to always look good, or always post, or post what is popular can often create a destructive pressure. I've recently learned that I need to blog because I love it and that is all. You may be wondering what I'm on about, so let me help you...

I first started blogging in 2011. I was passionate, excited and ready to share what I love with the world. My blog was first released for the world to see in February 2011 and I was so excited. I was apprehensive, much like a child is at their first day of school, but I was also excited about the prospect of making new friends who shared the same interests as me. I was new to the whole blogging world, I was fresh, I had an open mind. The novelty of it all was exuberating, I loved reading other peoples blogs and I was in absolute awe of people like Nicole Warne and Rumi Neely. I paid tribute to them in my early days showing the world a few of my many sources of inspiration. I loved reading peoples posts and waiting for new posts to see what some of these amazing bloggers would do. I loved it. 

After a while, I began to realise, not everyone was as excited about me blogging as I was. I realised that creating a new fashion related blogspot had a ripple effect. I noticed that starting a new blog was like the shift of a tectonic plate, causing extensive friction. Starting a blog was like throwing a stone into water and creating a ripple. As each ring grows, the older ripples dissipate into the great body of water, lost forever. In plain English  I realised that other bloggers were less likely to help each other as they felt they would become the older ripples. I didn't really understand why people felt as though they would become obsolete. Call me naive, but I just assumed bloggers had a unique ability to create many ripples and just when it looks like they're on their way into insignificance, they cast a new stone that causes a new set of ripples. Unfortunately, I was one of few who believed this to be true. I realised that the blogging world was a cut throat and lonely place. I have met some amazing bloggers, but on a whole, the blogging sphere is quite a harsh one. 

I soon got caught up in it all, the jealousy, the envy, the cycle. I was now one of the bloggers who resented the arrival of a new blogger. I began to compare myself with others, I began looking around sizing others up and eventually self destructing. My confidence had diminished. I had forgotten why I started blogging. I stopped posting as much and began resenting the fact that I had a passion for fashion. I began measuring my success based on my followers. I sent myself into a downward spiral and I couldn't even see what I was doing to myself. My passion began to die as I realised that I was no longer blogging because I loved it, but because I felt I was under compulsion to post. Even when I was losing the passion for what I had always wanted to do, I continued. I felt an undue pressure to be active, but I hadn't fixed my thoughts so the cycle continued. I would look at blogs more popular than mine, feel the pressure, make a post and if I wasn't completely satisfied with it, I would feel the pressure even more. 

I realised that I can't blog to gain followers, I can't blog to prove to the world that I am fashionable or extremely passionate about fashion. I have to blog because I love blogging. I need to blog because I love sharing what makes me smile and what makes me feel alive. I have recently realised that my passion for fashion started way before my first follower and I'm now privileged to share my thoughts, feelings and style with every single one of you guys. I love fashion, I love to style, I'm passionate about helping others to feel better about themselves, but I first need to become totally comfortable with who I am. I love that you guys read my posts and follow my blog, I love that we all share a common passion. Never lose your confidence, never lose your passion, never let the amount of followers determine whether you continue blogging or not. 

We love fashion and that's all that matters. Thank you for reading this, let's stop this weird cycle and appreciate our artistry. 

Love you all. 

Rachel. 

x